a one way ticket to somewhere

Lately, I've been deeply frustrated with many things. Mostly myself.

I am now 27 years old and have yet to find full time work. That in and of itself is an incredibly frustrating thing. To make it worse, the work I do currently have as an adjunct professor ends in two weeks, and I've screwed myself out of a continued appointment in the spring (while I was still being strung along by  holding out hope for waiting on Peace Corps, I declined to sign a new contract for the spring semester, a decision that I quickly questioned and regretted, as I quickly realized it was time to break up with Peace Corps).




All right, I've been trying to articulate how I'm feeling for almost an hour now. I just can't do it. I am sad, and frustrated, and worried, and frustrated, and just sick to death of constantly applying to jobs and being rejected.

Trying to take comfort in the facts that: lately I've been rejected by an actual person reviewing my information and just having other, stronger applicants rather than just getting nixed by the computer in the first round of the application process; I've at least figured out what I might want to be when I grow up and am taking classes and volunteering and networking and working really hard toward it; I have some really great family and friends who encourage and support me at every turn; probably some other things, probably the little things like hiking on beautiful farms and playing fun music with friends and having good lecture moments and the puppy sleeping on my lap right now and the new music Dispatch released today.

I just don't like where I am right now. Unemployment pending, no real plan, and all the frustration.

I don't really think I suck that much. I believe the terminology I've used before is "relatively well qualified citizen of earth". I don't need a pep talk right now. I like to think all of this hard work on my education (BA, MS and now community college coursework), volunteering, trying trying trying to be a decent human being, is going somewhere. Being optimistic is my nature, and even though it's been really, really, really hard lately, I'm still trying to be sunny and positive about my future. It's going somewhere.


You probably thought that was what the title of this post was alluding to, but I did actually buy a one way ticket to Las Vegas (aka I'm going to Arizona). I fly out in exactly a month, on Friday, January 4. I'm not going forever, but I'm going to hang out for an as of yet undetermined amount of time while I figure this all out. At least the company is good, even if I feel like I have nothing else going on.

I know I have other things going on. I'm just really frustrated at the present. And I'm getting even more frustrated that I can't really find the words to explain what's going on in my head right now, so I'm going to stop trying and just post this so you know that we should hang out soon.

This is not my best writing, but that's probably appropriate, because these are not my finest hours.  


EDITED TO ADD: Also neat that this is the 200th post in my blog about being on an adventure. It does not escape me, the juxtaposition between feeling stuck in my life and it being a sort of monumental post in the bigger picture of a grand adventure.

And let me be clear, I do not feel stuck with Mike or Arizona or going to Arizona. Those things are fine and wonderful. I just feel stuck with me.

There are planets you don't know and there are moons that you don't see

While we probably all well know that I am a big, big fan of Mr. Ritter's, this is not a song I am usually drawn to. It was in my head during this morning's pre-dawn commute under a very full moon...

Last month's full moon coincided with a rather big storm that we're only beginning to truly understand the scale of. A full moon high tide is responsible for minor flooding on a regular basis, even without winds and rain. I remember thinking about this going into the storm. Sitting down to lunch with the state climatologist a couple of weeks after the storm, he argued that the first high tide as Sandy and the full moon approached probably saved a lot of lives, scaring people off the islands as the water rose quickly well in advance of the actual storm. We all know that the various unprecedented factors of Sandy-- her size, her record breaking low pressure, her exceptional path, her combination with the second major storm front, her making landfall in the most densely populated part of the country, and of course that full moon-- made a serious impact on our landscape and our lives in the region.

New Jersey (and New York) won't be the same. The damages in NJ are almost as costly as the state's operating budget for the next year*. Trying to wrap one's mind around how much has changed is its own challenge. Trying to stay positive in light of many complicated questions about the rebuilding process is its own challenge. Trying to focus on other aspects of life and not be totally overwhelmed mourning the places and memories of my childhood is its own challenge. This has not been easy.

But then, there's this month's full moon. Many towns are still struggling with the aftermath and destruction of what happened under the last full moon, but the one I saw this morning on my drive to William Paterson was stunning and bright, and under this month's full moon, there was some joy. Julie and Matt welcomed baby Ryan to the world. Babies are neat, because they come without a care for things like hurricane damage or how the world around his has changed drastically since his childhood, because his childhood is ahead of him. He just gets to hang out and be loved. How peaceful and wonderful is that?

So, this morning, I'm thinking about the month between these full moons, and taking comfort in the little things, the good things, that come out of times like these. Life moves on, and today, that's a pretty reassuring thought. Welcome to the world, little one!



Edited to add--
*of course this has already been updated. After weeks of keeping numbers quiet, the initial cost of damages was released as being over $29 billion, which is nearly the $31.4ish billion budget for NJ for the next fiscal year. A revised number was released today: $36.8 billion.

Guardianing (Guardianship 101)

Saturday, day one: The 11 year old is still alive. Also, I already verbed "guardian". Success. (All right, she's about 1000% better than alive. We had excellent adventures, got some fresh air, ate some candy and a good dinner with friends by a wonderful fire, and had some good conversation in the car. She is now reading herself into a coma after brushing her teeth.) Spent the day at camp to offer some food and love and candy to our friends who are still without power. I did a soil science lab with two other kids in tow. It was good.

Sunday, day two: A relaxing day that involved a trip to Toys R Us to spend a birthday giftcard, and a lot of being lazy and hanging out. I got so much work done for school!

Monday, day three: Camp remains without power, so my backup (Ann and Lorelei) are still not really options, since we would freeze in our sleep and/or my leg would fall off (it has been 27 degrees up there at night-- they are incredible, strong people). Today, we drove from Cinnaminson to William Paterson, where at least she got to hang out with her brother for most of the day, and then to Mendham, where the amazing Hellriegel family welcomed us for trick or treating, dinner and sleeping over. Tomorrow we have to drive a long time again, because I cannot live with myself if I don't vote.

I stole a piece of her Halloween candy after she went to bed, because I assume that's one of my responsibilities as the parent figure, even if it's just a temporary arrangement.

Tuesday, day four: We drove. I voted. We hung out at my house all day with the zillions of dogs, cats and family members who are currently staying warm there. Sara became fast friends with my Uncle Don, teaming up to tell me how weird I am. We played the game of Life. We watched TV. We ate spaghetti. We drove to Harrison to stay with my superhero cousin and his super awesome fiancee (thank you thank you THANK YOU again for bailing us out of having to make the full commute this morning).

Wednesday, day five: So far, so good. Everyone's still alive, and she's not even totally sick to death of my company yet. We drove to school, where she hung out with her brother in the morning while I taught and met with students. 

On the way to school, I proved that I have what it takes to be a good guardian. I put the child before myself, and hid my pain. "Don't Stop Believing" came on the radio, and we listened to the whole thing. And I didn't turn it down or off. Major sacrifice.

After I was done for the day, we drove through the snow and the wind to arrive safely and warmly three hours later back in Cinnaminson. The rest of the week should be way more relaxed-- camp is still, very sadly, without power. I hope my friends there are staying warm and safe, especially as this new storm blows in. We are doing a good job of surviving the week, except for the shin splints I got while leaving the Paterson area (first gear second gear first gear second gear first gear second gear third gear first gear...)

Peace Corps Update, Part V

Part I
Parts II, III and IV

November 1

Dear (Recruiter 3),

I hope this finds you well. I don't expect you to receive this for a few days-- I know what that storm has done to my own hometown and county, and I understand Lower Manhattan is a mess and without power, too.

I am writing to you to withdraw my application. I've given it a lot of thought, and this just no longer strikes me as the right way to go about international service, in the context of my life. I want to thank you for being extremely helpful these past few months, always getting back to me, even when you didn't know the answer. You have been kind, honest, and patient with me, and I really do appreciate it.

Unfortunately, none of the reasons for my withdrawal have anything to do with you, but I don't know who else to share them with, as I have not had a productive relationship with your colleagues. That in and of itself it one of the reasons-- if the communication is so poor here in the United States, I have great concerns about being in the developing world with this organization. I understand through many RPCV friends that the experience is amazing if one can overlook the many flaws of Peace Corps, but I'm just not feeling entirely comfortable getting to that point.

In addition to lacking communication, some of it has just been incorrect. When my application was first withdrawn in February, I was told it was because of my lack of teaching experience and my lack of environmental studies, but by then I already had three years of teaching experience at the college level, and my BA and MS are both in environmental topics. Both degrees say Geography, but if the transcripts that I was required to send had been read, countless earth science, environment and development, climatology and human-environment interactions courses would have been noted. I was informed that these things rendered me ineligible for any environment-related positions, but then was nominated for exactly that several months later.

More recently, it was frustrating to receive no contact following the nomination for two months (save your emails letting me know that you didn't know any more than I did, and I thank you for those), until I heard from the Medical Services. They requested more information about a neurological disorder that I had already explained in the paperwork as being quelled; this is fine, I understand that it's something that most people are not familiar with. However, the paperwork I was sent was all related to Immunology and Rheumatology, which is just incorrect. The medical system is convoluted, and it was difficult to figure out which piece(s) of identification to include in my correspondence. I can generally overlook honest mistakes, but it has just felt like time and time again, my personal situation and information wasn't being considered particularly closely. Hopefully I am the only person repeatedly falling through the cracks like this.

At this point, the March departure is getting close. I have to pay my specialist, without insurance, to fill out the paper work regarding my neurological disorder; I know I'll have other general physical and dental exams to complete soon too. I've had to start considering my future too, which most immediately included making the decision whether to agree to teach another semester or not. I can't hold out hope forever and just not make arrangements to continue working. This is fast becoming an expensive commitment, and I haven't even begun to prepare for departure, since I know nothing about it. I'm not even guaranteed a final acceptance and placement.

The past year since I first applied to Peace Corps has been quite an adventure. At first, it was exciting, with a successful interview and a recruiter who was answering my initial questions swiftly and kindly. However, this quickly turned to a very negative experience. I don't expect Peace Corps workers to be my personal counselor, but a little compassion would have been welcomed-- weren't they in my shoes once? I was ignored for several weeks following the initial withdrawal, and then of course the incident occurred when I received a late evening phone message on a Friday, when he would not be able to respond to me for over a week.

This breaks my heart. I wanted so badly to represent my country and to bring my education and desire to serve to the developing world. I'm hopeful that I'll find another way to accomplish this that is less agonizing. I was told many times by friends in Peace Corps that if I could just get beyond the disorganization and bureaucratic nonsense, it was a worthwhile experience. I'm sure it is, but the organization doesn't seem too intent on getting me there, and I don't have the where with all to do it myself at this point in my life. I hope the overhaul of the system eventually lends itself to placing strong candidates in places that need them and providing an incredible experience to all involved. Unfortunately, that was not my experience.

Thank you again, (Recruiter 3), for all of your hard work for me. I really appreciate that you managed to nominate me and encourage me through this. Please let me know if there is anything else I need to do. Wishing you well.
Peace,
Colleen





Kind of insulting: after two months of virtual silence, I received an IMMEDIATE response from both Recruiter number 3 and the placement desk in Washington, D.C. that was allegedly handling my application, confirming my withdrawal.

FLASH OF GENIUS, re: Sandy. and sand.

FLASH OF GENIUS, EVERYONE. If all of the beach kids get together and vacuum out our cars, dump out our shoes and shake out our bedsheets, that should be at least enough sand to repair a few beaches...

Sandy Frankenstorm.

Well.



Miscellaneous interjection, but also my wishes for everyone right now. I hope this finds you well.

It's been an overwhelming week to say the least. I came home to Toms River ahead of the storm, and my family was fortunate enough to only lose power for a few hours, and barely experience any damage to our home. Less than a mile east, the Barnegat Bay flooded homes and ate away at the coastline. Less than five miles south, the Toms River rose, submerging downtown. Less than five miles east has fallen into the ocean.

I have wonderful memories of many summer days spent at Island Beach State Park. We had family picnics ever August in Normandy. I have Ortley Beach badges going back more than a decade, and more recently have spent a lot of time walking to the beach from my friend's house in South Seaside Park. Just a week ago, I drove the entire Coastal Heritage Trail to complete the Lighthouse Challenge for the third year in a row with three of my best friends.

I love New Jersey more than most people. This is heartbreaking. Devastating. Just... awful. But what's making it even worse for me is cynicism and negative attitudes. It's really hard to be optimistic in the face of the absolute wreckage, but focusing on stupid political things and how the power company hasn't gotten to you yet isn't going to make it better. Maybe that's easy for me to say because I haven't been without power, but I've been there before, honest. We went a week without power, water, phones and much of anywhere to safely go after Irene last year. The families who live on site at Johnsonburg are toughing through that for the third time in a year right now. Even still, I called to see if I could bring anything, and I was asked if they could do anything for my community.
 





Why not assume the best? Over three million customers without power is A LOT OF CUSTOMERS. I've read things about New Jersey turning away non-union workers, but maybe there's something more to it that we don't understand, and besides, they've gone on to help our neighbors in New York. Millions of people have power back at this point, and so many people are working around the clock to make that happen. And honestly, as inconvenient as losing power is, there are so many who have it way worse just a few miles away in a shelter because their entire home, power and all, is gone. 

I love this website because right now, I think being positive is more important than ever. My favorite thing about post-Irene? Thankfully heat was not really an issue, but we just spent time together. We talked. We laughed. We sang. We got a good night's sleep.

No matter how alone we feel, we're not. No matter how devastating this is, it's not forever. No matter how much it will never be the same, at least we had it in the first place, and other great things will come from this. Power will come back. Things can be replaced-- or maybe they don't need to be. But we still have each other and the great, great Garden State. Am I foolish in my optimism? Maybe, but I don't really care.

Peace Corps Update, Parts II, III and IV

Part I can be found here.

Part II: When leaving camp around 7:55PM on June 22 as referenced in this post, I got a call from a New York City number (area code 212). I don't know when or why I got into the habit of ignoring calls from unknown numbers, but I did, figuring, if it was important, they'd leave a message.

They left a message. I listened right away. It was a different recruiter from Peace Corps. He wanted to talk. Call him back.

I called back immediately. Actually, I called back many times, over and over, alternating between his direct line and the main number. Nothing. What did he do, call and then sprint out of the office? Why on earth would he call so late on a Friday anyway?

I called back first thing Monday. Nothing. I left a message. I called a few other times during the day and got no one at his number or the main number. Getting really, really frustrated. On Tuesday, same thing. Eventually on Wednesday, someone answered the main line and told me that the office was actually technically closed for the week, she was just trying to catch up on paperwork. But she listened, and apologized, and promised she'd figure it out for me. Except, I was going to be in Canada the following week and couldn't take calls.

Come to find out via voice mail from Recruiter 2 while visiting the US on July 4, that he was just calling to check in and see if I wanted to continue the process. Way to freak me out and get me all sorts of excitedupsetfurioussadthrilledexcitedsad. I decide to remain in limbo ("withdrawn"), but the girl who answered the phone when the office was closed became my new recruiter.

Part III: Seven days before this post, while I was getting my luggage out of the Jeep at Alice's place in Fishtown and tying my boots (didn't want the heavy shoes in my checked luggage when it needed to be under 50 pounds and already contained a case of Yuengling), I received a phonecall from a 212 number, and after contemplating ignoring it again, I answered it. It was the third recruiter, offering me a nomination...

...on the condition that I fill out the new application. They've changed over to a new system since I was withdrawn (see Part I). I filled it out. It was tedious and frustrating, but I did it, carefully.

Then I waited.

and waited.



and waited.

and my recruiter knew nothing because I am one of the first people in the country under this new system, and no one knows anything.

Part IV: After two months of no contact, I receive an update from the medical services, requesting more information about my nerve disorder, which was inevitable. They sent me paperwork on Immunology and Rheumatology, which my NEUROLOGICAL DISORDER is not. You know, the dystrophy that I clearly wrote about under "Neurological Information" on the initial health form. I do understand simple mistakes, but it seems that I am constantly a simple mistake, and continually fall through the cracks on every little thing with them. I am being strung along in a bad relationship.

1475 pictures later...

The rest of my southwestern expedition was good. After sleeping like rocks, we woke up and drove west on I-40 through forests, mountains and fields, with our first stop at Dunkin Donuts in Kingman, AZ.There are not many Dunkin Donuts in Arizona, in fact, Dunkin Donuts and Google were both incredibly confused about this one existing at all. If we hadn't seen the sign on the highway, we wouldn't have known.

We drove back down through the mountains to the desert, passing by the occasional trailer or shack on our way to Hoover Dam. Fascinating landscape. So apparently there is this history of forestry and mining in the region, but I don't understand why someone would just build a tiny house in the middle of the desert with nothing and no one for many miles. I mean, I saw outhouses. Legit outhouses. And not all of these places were connected to the power lines. Very interesting.

Lots of cactus.

We arrived at Hoover Dam in the middle of the day, and were very disappointed at how much money we were fooled into spending just to see the thing up close. We paid for parking-- ok, reasonable. But then we were charged to enter the visitor center, with no real clue that you didn't have to go through there just to visit the dam. We just wanted to walk across the damn dam. It was impressive though, tons and tons and tons of concrete and so much water backed up behind it. I kind of hate the ecological impact of something like that, but it is kind of impressive. Lake Mead is mind blowingly large.

We drove to Vegas with a stop at Del Taco, which was very tasty. We stayed at Circus Circus-- really nice room for super cheap, probably because they expected us to throw all of our money into their machines. Free parking, too. We took a cab down to the main part of the strip, spending the evening being exhausted by over-stimulation, but it was cool to see the lights and fountains and madness.

I'm home in New Jersey now, and have survived the first day of classes at both William Paterson and Rutgers Brookdale. I'm excited about teaching again but I definitely have my work cut out for me. I have a few small outings planned but will pretty much be staying in New Jersey this semester-- at least, as best I can guess right now. After I left camp last fall, I didn't expect to do much traveling this summer, if any besides the Jr. High Mission trip. Lucky for me, my life is more exciting than that--


From June to August, I visited 16 states (NJ, CA, NV, PA, OH, MI, NY, DE, MD, VA, NC, CT, MA, NH, ME, AZ) and 4 provinces (Ontario, New Brunswick, Nova Scotia, Prince Edward Island), took 4 flights (Philadelphia to San Francisco and back, Philadelphia to Las Vegas and back), drove/rode in a car for over 6500 miles. I took 1475 pictures and experienced an infinite number of beautiful and awesome things.

I am pretty fortunate.

CHARISMATIC GEOMORPHOLOGY!

Today, we woke up early and watched the sun rise in the Grand Canyon. I don't even know how to begin to describe how incredible it was to stare into this giant, awesome hole in the ground all day.

We left Bullhead City a little after 2 AM to make it to the South Rim in plenty of time for sunrise. It was cool and rainy, but the weather stopped for a few minutes to enjoy the sun pouring through the clouds, lighting up the canyon brilliantly. Even overcast, it was just so beautiful. Mike will tell you his favorite stupid thing I said today was probably just after sunrise, as we took pictures of the stunning canyon. I turned to this lovely Utah Juniper next to me and said, "I love this tree." You know, while standing next to the Grand Canyon. I was just in awe of everything I could see.

We decided to hike about a mile and a half kind of southeast from Mather Point (a great overlook closest to the first visitors center in the park) to Pipe Creek Vista. It just rained the entire time, and was so chilly and windy. I enjoyed the biodiversity along the trail in addition to the changing view of the canyon itself. It was really nice to just have a walk by ourselves, without loud tourists and worrying about getting in the way of other people's photos. We were so cold and soaked by the end of it that we were thankful when a park shuttle pulled up to the vista just as we finished a timer photo of our sad, soggy selves. We weren't really that sad though, just in need of some hot tea.

After we warmed up and dried off a bit, the rain mostly stopped for the day, just occasional spitting. We packed some snacks and my tree book into a backpack and took off, hiking along the rim trail about four miles to the west of Mather Point, stopping often just to soak it all in. I felt so small all day, but it didn't make me feel lonely or pointless. It felt cozy. I'm such a small part of such a big world, but things are pretty great. I mean, come on, I spent my day at the Grand Canyon. Didn't expect that this summer!

We hiked down the Bright Angel trail a little bit, though we had a short night of sleep to make it out to the canyon in the first place, and had already hiked quite a bit at a way higher elevation than either of us are really used to having grown up at sea level. We sat for a while on one little outcropping. We were tired. It was glorious, but we decided to take the shuttle back to the main parking area mid-afternoon.

I'd been doing so well, but as soon as I sat down on that bus, I was just beat. Done. I kind of nodded off a bit as we took the trip back, until we passed one little road with a lot of cars and people stopped and crowded around this little gully. The bus driver announced that we might want to look out the left side of the bus-- a bull elk was feeding there.

!!!

Charismatic megafauna of the day: BULL ELK. That woke me up! We got off at that next stop and hurried over to get some pictures. The elk didn't really give a care that everyone was watching him, just kept munching on trees and grass and knocking down branches that got tangled in his enormous rack. It was incredible. It almost didn't seem real. He was huge! And very peaceful. We kept a safe distance to keep it that way.

While taking pictures of the elk, we spoke to a nice couple from Flagstaff, where we're staying tonight. They recommended a sweet brew pub downtown. We made the trip to Flag, through some really heavy rains and some really interesting national forests-- Arizona just keeps blowing my mind. Rain! Trees! FORESTS?! It's so green at 8000 feet. I was also amused that the part of the Kaibab Forest that we drove through on Route 180 didn't even really have trees, it was mostly just open rangeland. Still really beautiful, and just awesome to see storm clouds in the distance dumping rain on the mountains surrounding us.

So that brewpub in Flagstaff: Beaver Street Brewpub. Really great beer and food. Good end to a great day.

Beer of the day: R & R Stout, a really smooth, rich but not offensive stout that even Mike liked

Tree of the day: That Utah Juniper probably deserves it most, but I also enjoyed familiarizing myself with Pinyon Pines (they look vaguely sprucey), Ponderosa Pines (really cool looking red and black bark once they mature), and the Gambel Oak (just because I was sitting at the edge of the canyon with my tree book open at one point, with one of those in front of me)

Charismatic geomorphology of the day: Grand Canyon. And when the term "charismatic geomorphology" is a thing in the coming years, I want everyone to remember where they heard it first...

THREE corners

Yesterday, Mike took a half day from school to get his Arizona driver's license and plates. Obviously other adventures ensued...

After 2.5 hours at the Motor Vehicle Department, we set off to find the Three Corners. That's right, three. It's not really a thing, I just wanted to find the spot where California, Nevada and Arizona came together at the Colorado River. The earth view on Google Maps suggested that there would be agriculture on the Arizona side, desert in Nevada, and a small access road in California.


View Larger Map

Leaving Arizona, we drove into the Fort Mojave Indian Reservation, which I learned from NRCS this week is actually kind of checkerboarded with BLM (Bureau of Land Management) lands and privately owned lands. It was amazing to smell the greenness (I'm serious, it smells way different than the desert) of the alfalfa and cotton along the river.

The road that I saw on Google Maps turned out to be a dirt road, which we didn't feel super comfortable going down 1. without four wheel drive (the sand is pretty soft in places) and 2. not knowing whose land it was. We were just about in three states at once when we crossed the bridge though--


View Larger Map

So instead we went back into Arizona to drive down to Needles, California because I wanted to visit California on this trip. There is pretty much nothing in needles though, but we did find a riverfront marina park, and I got to put my feet in the Colorado River. It was cool water, but very refreshing.

We had dinner at a Mexican restaurant in Fort Mohave on our way back to Bullhead City. Upon getting home, Mike changed his license plates over, and we washed the New Jersey plates and hung them on the wall.

We've planned a trip to the Grand Canyon this weekend before I fly out of Vegas. It will be the first time for either of us to visit there. Pretty excited!

AZ hot as I thought...

So, I'm in Arizona. That makes 15 states and 4 provinces since June, 4 states and 3 provinces of which were new for me. And I thought I wouldn't get to travel much this year...

This is my first time to the southwest. I've had a layover in Las Vegas before, but that only counts so far as running through the slot machines at the terminals to make my next flight and seeing nothing but darkness surrounding all of the lights of Vegas as we landed and took off.

I landed around 10:30 PM local Friday/1:30 AM EDT Saturday after spending a sweet day in Philadelphia with a few friends. Mike kindly watched my flight status and was there waiting for me at baggage, even though I was half an hour early. We left the airport for our hour and a half drive back to where he's now living in Bullhead City, AZ, and I swear I felt like I was on the moon (a little bit tired, but really the landscape with nothing but headlights on it looks like the moon, hilly and rocky and sandy).

Mike had a blood-borne pathogens test to take at his school on Saturday morning, so I got to see his classroom and his school (there is NOTHING around it but desert and some far-off looking mountains) and met a few of his fellow faculty members. Other than that, I admittedly spent most of the weekend napping. I find it remarkable how much I love traveling, given the fact that I am terrible at time zone changes (not to mention excessive car sickness, which thankfully hasn't been an issue so far this trip). We did have dinner with a woman he teaches with and her husband, who live at the edge of a country club-- it's very weird seeing grass, but there are quite a few golf courses here in the desert (Mohave County at least borders the Colorado River, so they aren't pumping water too terribly far...)

While Mike goes to school, I've mostly sat around working on my Soil Science course online, or my syllabi for the three courses I'm teaching at William Paterson and Rutgers this fall. I have spent two days this week volunteering with the local NRCS office, which has allowed me to get out and adventure a little bit. I've mentioned once or twice on here that I've been volunteering with them since April, and I LOVE IT. Seriously. I just adore the things I've been able to see and learn about in the name of conservation all over New Jersey, and now in a small part of Arizona.

On Tuesday, I drove from Bullhead City through Union and Coyote Passes (~3500 and 3700 feet, respectively), through the Golden Valley and into Kingman to meet up with Erin, a rangeland specialist with NRCS. She took me to Peach Springs, in Hualapai Territory, via Old Route 66 for a meeting with some producers and conservationists about concerns and conservation practices in the area.


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It was a long day, but I got to see a lot of upper desert, into the mountains and across a plateau. I asked poor Erin about a million questions about Arizona vegetation, landforms and conservation, but she didn't seem to mind (she chose this as her career, after all). It has rained a little bit recently, so there are a lot of new grasses popping up all over the place, making the desert a lot greener than I expected.

Yesterday, I got to help Erin with a Natural Resource Inventory, which is basically taking note of every soil, rock and plant (and animals, which there weren't really any where we were) in a circle 150 feet in diameter. It took us about five hours, and we finished measuring and sampling just before noon. I was very grateful that there were some clouds and it was cooler at the higher elevation in the Kingman area, but it was a very cool experience getting to know the ecosystem pretty closely. Hopefully my Soil Science course will land me a job with these people in the future.

In the meantime, having a wonderful stay in Arizona!

multiple trips

On Wednesday, July 4, we (Mike, Katie, another leader from our church John, and I) decided to take a trip into Michigan to celebrate Independence Day on the American side of the St. Clair River. We thought it would be so cool to have our passports stamped on July 4, but were disappointed that the border guard flat refused to, claiming it doesn't get stamped for land crossings. The Canadian officer said the same thing, even though I know that's a lie, since I have several stamps from Canadian land borders, the most recent from a few weeks ago...

At the end of the awesome week, Katie, Mike and I decided to take the scenic route home through southern Ontario, Niagara Falls and the Adirondacks. We saw a lot of beautiful, peaceful things. Between Walpole Island and Niagara, if you take a more southern route (we took Route 3 pretty much straight across) you'll find lots of farmland, some wind turbines, apparently some vineyards (I slept through that part), more agriculture...

Peaceful.

Niagara Falls was cool. I'd been there once before with Jamie, Amanda and Katie, but having Katie with a very, very broken foot, it was difficult to explore. This time, Mike, Katie and I were able to wander all along the river. I was absolutely mesmerized by the upper river, watching all of that water pouring over the edge and noticing what little weeds had managed to root themselves and grow along the edge.

After a good dinner at a pub and some wandering around, we decided to take our tired selves back into the US for a good night's sleep in New York, at a place to be determined once Mike had domestic service for his magical smart phone. Well, we made it into New York, and then while Mike was looking down at his phone and Katie was focusing on not getting car sick and I was driving on I-190 North... right back into Ontario. There was no way to turn around before the border check, so I hung my head and told the guard how embarrassed I was to go the wrong way. Well, it's also New York's fault for not putting any sort of LAST EXIT IN THE US sign before the last exit.

So we spent another night in Canada, in Niagara Falls, before returning to the United States to search for moose in the Adirondacks. No such luck spotting any, but we did find a lot of beautiful lakes, the gorgeous Roosevelt-Marcy trail, and some great trees.

Of course, the fact that Katie and I had our passports scanned into and out of Canada four times in the month of July had me a little nervous heading back through customs at the end of JACK's recent Maritime madness, but we clearly sailed through without a problem.

Exhausting, but a very good adventure through multiple mission trips and many new places.

multiple trips, part 1

This was totally crazy, but I did two mission trips back to back this year.

This all started because Katie, Mike and I were thinking about going to where the Sr. Highs would be and camping for a few days, visiting them on their half day off, because those all used to be our Jr. Highs and they asked us about a million times if we were going with them. If we went with them, who would go with the Jr. Highs? Well, it so happened that the organization we go on mission trips with needed volunteers for the Walpole Island, ON trip that our Sr. Highs were going on. Specifically, worship leader... and after a lot of thought, I auditioned. And got it. And talked them into taking on a few extra site coaches so I could drag my friends into this with me...

Week one: Jr. High trip to Irwin, PA. The Pennsylvania Turnpike was basically the same as always, and Irwin is a typical rust belt kind of town, just a little outside of Pittsburgh. My assignment for the week was to paint a shed and repair some porch steps and paint a porch and its ceiling for a very sweet elderly woman. My crew was super awesome and hard working, so we finished that project early and were able to talk the organization into letting us stain the neighbor's deck.

It was a good week. Our middle school group is a bunch of really good, hilarious kids. They attempted at one point to create some drama for themselves, but quit as soon as the adults called them on it. We had a lot of fun together. Our leadership team was pretty stellar, four men and then my dear friend Katie and me for the girls.

Week two: Sr. High trip to Walpole Island, Ontario. We had managed to keep it a secret from the high school group that we would be there, and really the only chance we had left of them finding out before their arrival was if their younger siblings on the Jr. High trip called/ sent a text when they got home. As the Jr. Highs prepared to depart on the bus, Katie and Mike and I did not board, explaining that Katie and I get too carsick to handle the bus, so would be riding with Mike. Didn't lie, just didn't tell the whole truth.

In fact, when they were dragging their feet getting packed up and on the bus, we started joking with them that they were being SO ridiculous, we should just drive to Canada instead. None of them noticed our jokes. It was 6 AM.

So to Canada we went. We drove through northern Ohio, stopping at a bird reserve and the Toledo Botanical Gardens, as well as a Waffle House (probably the best stop we made). Walpole Island is a First Nation Reservation just across the river from Algonac, Michigan, just a little north of Detroit. We took a short ferry ride to get there, across some very blue water.

I unfortunately didn't get out and about as much as I'd have liked, but did get to see a bit of the island and meet some of the residents. Interesting people, and a good range of people who were happy to welcome visitors and share their culture and history, and people who think that all people who are different from them are only on this planet to screw them over. It was very sad to talk to them. One of my favorite people I met was a woman who wanted to tell me about her trees. She was very proud of the Crimson King she had planted on the property before she could even afford to build a house there. Crimson Kings have very dense foliage and make wonderful shade trees. It was pretty glorious. Tree of the day, for sure.

post dated

This post is not actually being posted when it happened (4-6 June). Right now, I am secretly in Reno, Nevada.

"Ne-vă-da! Short A!" -Mike

I don't even know where to start with this. Mike had an interview in Reno and decided to fly into San Francisco and make a trip of it, and talk me into joining him, mostly by promising me redwood trees. Twist my arm, will you. It worked.

EPIC.

We landed in San Francisco and got on the road about 10AM local time. We'd already been awake for 11 hours at this point, with all of the adventures ahead of us still. Excellent. We wandered around Fisherman's Wharf and Pier 39, acquiring caffeine and Ranier cherries and checking out the sea lions.

Drove up and down Lombard Street. Drove across the Golden Gate Bridge. Glorious.

At my dad's good recommendation, we stopped in Golden Gate National Recreation Area and drove up the windy, windy (one of those was weather and one of those was the adjective describing the not straight roads) road to an awesome vista of the bridge, the bay and the Pacific Ocean. The clouds even lifted for about thirty seconds of ridiculous scrambling to take pictures.

Next on the docket was an important, life-altering, beautiful thing. Tree of the day: Muir Woods. Because I was secretly on this trip, I couldn't tell anyone that this was happening AND IT WAS KILLING ME. I offered this on facebook in hopes that the few people in the loop would share my joy, but... REDWOOD TREES... and I couldn't tell anyone. It's like nothing I've ever seen. They're just so tall, and... tall. So tall. My mind was blown by one that was measured and determined to be as old as the United States. This 236 year old tree just seemed so tiny, because others around it were hundreds more years old. Just stunning.

Sadly, I had to leave that place because we did need to eventually make it to Reno. Driving on I-80 in this part of the country is very different than at home in NJ. We drove through Tahoe National Forest and into the Sierras after a brief stop for lunch in the Napa Valley. We noticed it was getting chillier as we drove up, and were shocked/ amused by the signs we passed announcing the elevation (for two kids who grew up at sea level, one of whom had not left the time zone before in his life? It was kind of awesome.)

We continued to ascend until we reached Donner Pass, which was kind of mind blowing to see in real life when I'd mostly only known it through the Oregon Trail computer game. I can imagine how one would get stranded there in the spring or fall, given that we were there in JUNE and there had been several inches of snow that morning. Out of the ordinary, for sure, but it still happened. In fact, it was so unusual that a news team was parked at the rest area where Mike and I stopped to have a snowball fight... and then they interviewed us for the evening news.

Reno itself was very interesting, just a big empty town in the middle of mountains and desert. We stayed at a casino just a few miles from his interview, just absolutely passing out after a full day (and a half, when you consider travel time and time change!) of adventures. The next morning we drove around town a little bit to kill time before Mike's interview, which went really, really well.

We celebrated at Great Basin Brewpub in Sparks (which is basically just the other, slightly-nicer half of Reno). Great food-- jalapeno wonton poppers? We need to figure out how to make those at home. But the beer was also really good. We tried samples of just about everything they had on tap, some better than others. The Cerveza Chilebeso (chili kiss beer) was pretty awesomely done, but we were most impressed with the Ichthyosaur IPA, also known as Icky. In fact, we brought a six pack home with which to celebrate whenever he would eventually get his first full time teaching job.

The rest of the trip was kind of hurry-- we didn't really leave much time for wandering off the beaten path, but we woke up early enough to see dawn in the Sierras (gorgeous, and now we more fully understand what "purple mountain majesties" means) and head back to San Francisco via Lake Tahoe, which was REALLY chilly for it being June. Beautiful though.

Cool trip. I loved seeing a part of the country that I had never seen anything like before. Also cool was finding out when we landed in Philly that he passed the first round interview and was eligible for hire in Washoe County, NV... except, we now know what would come of that... but it gives me a new place to visit in less than two weeks!

This is how JACK feels about Canada:

(at the Citadel in Halifax, created by Katie)

After Nova Scotia and Prince Edward Island, we traveled back into New Brunswick over a very long bridge. I know there are no moose on Price Edward Island, but I am sad and disappointed to report that we did not see any moose for the remainder of our trip.

We drove from Charlottetown, PEI to Fredericton, NB, stopping along the way to see a few statues of giant things, which seems to be our new thing to do. Maybe http://www.bigthings.ca will sponsor JACK's third tour of Canada? (Probably not, as it was last updated the summer after we all graduated from high school, but it was still a pretty helpful website in planning our adventures.)

Fredericton was a quiet city for it being Saturday night and the opening of the Olympic games. We had dinner at a place called The Snooty Fox, which had great food and a decent selection of Canadian craft brews. Most curious to me was a sandwich on the menu called the Wyatt Earp... the only sandwich on the menu named after someone. Apparently the cooks just really liked the movie Tombstone. I was still pretty amused. It's a steak sandwich, so I had an epic quesadilla instead, along with a beer from Picaroon's Brewery right there in town. It was really fun to watch the opening ceremonies and the Parade of Nations during dinner-- the US didn't get to see it till prime time!

We walked around town a little bit after dinner, mostly along the waterfront, enjoying a humid but otherwise beautiful evening. The hostel we stayed in was just a few blocks from downtown, so we walked everywhere. Eventually, ACK went back to Snooty Fox to enjoy a bit more of the opening ceremonies and a few more Canadian brews.

Our last real day of vacation involved the trip from Fredericton and Portland, back into the US. Katie and I were nervous because this would be the fourth time our passports were swiped back into the US in the month of July, but the border patrol didn't seem to mind us (guess I didn't explain all the exits and entries yet, will get to that after I finish writing about JACK's Canada excursion). We stopped in Nackawic on the way to see a giant axe representing the importance of the logging industry to New Brunswick's history.

In the Portland area, we were able to find a few more large things-- the world's largest chocolate moose (1700 pounds of pure milk chocolate, accompanied by a few dark chocolate bears ranging from 80 pounds to 300) and also the world's largest spinning globe (three stories high!). We relaxed in Portland and watched some Olympic swimming and beach volleyball.

Driving back to New Jersey wasn't particularly impressive. I drove us out of New England, Jamie took over in Connecticut. We made good time and arrived home to sunshine, which was helpful in unpacking the Fundy wreckage. It smelled pretty rough but didn't knock us over. All in all, another wonderful adventure with my beloved JACK!

Things That Have Happened Since the Last Post

After Alma, we began our trip to Halifax, stopping first at Hopewell Rocks in The Rocks Provincial Park. So cool. We hiked down to the beach and wandered around during low, low tide. I spent the whole time staring at the rocks, trying to figure out the patterns of weathering and how high the tide goes without consulting any of the signs in the visitors center.

I'm a nerd.

We drove into Nova Scotia and made it to Halifax by late afternoon. Our hostel was an old building, conveniently located across the street from another old building that housed a restaurant and bar. We had some really great food and Amanda and I had some really great beer from New Brunswick, Nova Scotia and Quebec.

Meanwhile, Mike had an interview for a teaching job in Arizona.

After dinner we decided to walk around the city, which really resulted in us wandering down the waterfront, taking pictures and acting ridiculous (surprise, surprise). There were a few large sculptures and anchors that we thought it was necessary to climb on, and the sunset was gorgeous. We went back to the same place for dessert and beer before unloading the car and turning in. We had left our wet shoes on the hood of the car to dry a little more (and stop making the car smell awful) as a social experiment, figuring if someone stole our worn out, soaking wet, nasty smelling shoes, they really, REALLY needed them more than we did. Well, apparently no one in Halifax was that desperate for shoes.

Around midnight Mari-time (11PM Eastern time, 8PM Pacific time), we received word: Mike got the job. Yay! Except that means he has to leave on Friday, at least two and a half days before I get home from Canada. While that is excessively unfortunate, let's focus on the yay job part! Congratulations, Mike.

This morning, we visited the Citadel in Halifax, a historic naval base. It was interesting to read a bit about the War of 1812 from another perspective... beautiful structure, interesting to wander through some of the creepy passages and look over the ramparts.

We took a creative route to Prince Edward Island, stopping in Stewiacke for a picnic lunch and a picture with a huge statue of a mastadon. The ferry was huuuuuuuuge. Thankfully, despite 50% of us being the carsickest people I've ever met, we didn't have too much trouble on the boat. It was a gorgeous day for a ride across the Northumberland Strait.

The drive into Prince Edward Island was interesting. Guess I should have review my Eastern North America notes, because somehow I was surprised by the myriad of agriculture happening around us. It may also just have been seeing things that I just associate with much different scenery-- corn, soy, wheat, other things that I see growing at home, or associate with the midwest, where the windbreaks are not spruce trees and they don't grow right next to the beach. Very pretty and peaceful here though, and I always enjoy a nice drive through farm country.

We watched the sun set on Brackley Beach in Prince Edward Island National Park, where I would learn what sand fleas are.

...

We are now settled into our enormous lighthouse suite. Seriously, there are multiple rooms and floors. If you are logged into facebook, and friends with me, you should be able to view our tour video:



And, in case you were wondering what the dancing was about, we did seriously spend our evening learning this (although we improvised some of the crazy foot work, especially at the end).

Tree of the day: Red Oak, the provincial tree of Prince Edward Island, as well as the state tree of New Jersey (more specifically the Northern Red Oak, one of many red oak varieties in NJ but the only one that grows this far north, according to my tree book and eyes)

Next up: Fredericton, New Brunswick, via Charlottetown, Prince Edward Island and the Confederation Bridge, and giant lobster, rooster and magnet statues

Epilogue for Alma

I am overjoyed to be wearing dry clothes for the first time today.

We did go to Alma Beach, where the tide was pretty much right up to the deck where I took my first picture of the water further away than I could see. Mind boggling. Looking forward to sharing pictures. While Jamie and Katie went swimming, Amanda and I went to some of the places we visited in the morning to get shots of the high tide.We also visited our campsite to figure out just how bad the situation is... it's bad. We imagine the cleanup tomorrow morning will be pretty comical. We plan to wear bathing suits.

Seafood dinner at one of the little places in Alma. JAK seemed pretty pleased with their various forms of fish and lobster. I was pleased enough with my sexy iceberg salad (seriously, that's what it was called on the menu) and Katie's french fries. After dinner, Amanda and I made ourselves at home in the Village Laundromat, enjoying beers while our laundry washed (and more importantly, dried). I discovered late in the day that my suitcase did not fare as well as I'd thought; everything seemed dry when I rescued it from our flooded tent, but it turns out the jeans at the bottom had absorbed a lot of the water and slowly soaked everything else over the course of the afternoon. Thankfully I noticed this before dinner, and thankfully there was a laundromat in this tiny town.

And so, I sit here in my warm, dry pajama pants with warm, dry socks on, winding down for bed. We're all just kind of hanging out. It ended up being a really great day despite the weather plotting to ruin things for us. It's kind of a good thing that we all adore each other. I'm very fortunate to have such great friends and travel partners.

Fundy

Dear Mom,
If I concede defeat and admit you were right, will you enjoy that feeling and get over it before I get home?

You were right. I was wrong. The tent leaks.

Love,
Colleen

After a pleasant morning and afternoon in Saint John, we drove to Fundy National Park, travelling via a road with a really creepy horse skelton statue. We sent up the tent and explored the park a little on our way into the nearby town of Alma for chocolate (we had marshmallows and graham crackers!). We decided on a chill evening-- campfire, a couple of beers, and a good night of sleep with the sound of the wind running through the spruce trees surrounding our little campsite.

Woke up early to search for moose. It was really, really overcast and the camp office had posted a weather report of 90% probability of precipitation. We decided to hope for the best and head out hiking anyway. We did three short trails: one called Caribou Plain, through some wetlands and peat bogs (no moose, though we hear it's a popular place for them to hang out), one along Dickson Falls (totally lovely, despite a LOT of stairs), and Shiphaven, which was along the Point Wolfe River with coastal views... that were largely obstructed by the heavy rains. By then we were all soaked, so we just kept going.

We decided to check on our campsite since we were nearby, and lo and behold, bad news, my sleeping bag was UNDER WATER, as I had slept at the bottom of the slight incline we parked the tent on in the first place. Everyone's things were soaked. We decided to go visit the low tide at Alma Beach and find a cafe in town to regroup and book a hotel.

I feel really silly for wimping out of camping in poor weather, but we don't really have any other option.

The beach was really cool. The tide was really, really far out so we walked down on the beach, which is covered in rocks of all colors, shapes and sizes. Can't wait to see it again at high tide, which is in about fifteen minutes.

We spent some time warming up in a little cafe, where we sorted out the hotel situation. We couldn't get into our room for at least half an hour, so to kill time we went searching for the "neaby" lighthouse at Cape Enrage. Terrible car ride, but lovely scenery. We've just been hanging out the rest of the afternoon, reading and napping. Right now we're gearing up to visit Alma Beach again for high tide (about ten minutes from now, about a ten second drive from here) and then visiting a heated salt water pool in the park that's apparently on the edge of a cliff or something pretty sounding like that. It's still rather misty out, but we're glad to do something.

Tent reconnaissance is scheduled for tomorrow morning since it can't really get any wetter.
Tree of the yesterday: red spruce
Beer of the yesterday: Rickard's Dark, a porter-style beer with a slight maple syrup aftertaste

Tree of today: Hemlocks, which I'm going to miss when the wooly adelgid totally wipes them off the face of the east coast in the coming years

Tomorrow: Halifax, Nova Scotia! 

Mari-time travel

I always knew that Newfoundland is half an hour ahead, in its own time zone... I just didn't know that it was half an hour ahead of the hour ahead that the rest of Maritime Canada is... meaning, it's 10:30 here while our brains are on 9:30. We didn't notice this till after dinner.

Aside from time travel, it's been a pretty laid back day. We drove almost exclusively on Route 1 from Portland, Maine to Saint Stephen, New Brunswick. Long drive, but really lovely. Maine this time of year can pretty much be summer up as blueberries, antiques and trees. Lots of adorable towns, lots of pretty views of bays, lots of seagulls.

No moose. YET.

We have arrived safely in Saint John, New Brunswick after a very exciting border crossing at Saint Stephen. I mean, mostly it was me just being really excited to be back in Canada, because I think this country is great and could see nothing but trees past the border station. Also, the border patrolman was very nice and stamped our passports, which was not the case traveling back and forth between Walpole Island, Ontario and Algonac, Michigan (which I have yet to tell you about, but aside from those being neat places, it was very disappointing that the border patrol REFUSED to stamp our passports, claiming that they don't do that for land crossings anymore. More on this another time, right now I'm excited that I did get a nice new stamp today).

We just returned from dinner at this great brewpub in the Uptown district of Saint John called Big Tide Brewing Company. We took a short stroll and saw some beautiful old buildings, and took a short drive and spent some time staring at the Reversing Falls, where the Saint John Harbour/Bay of Fundy meet the Saint John and Kennebecasis Rivers/Grand Bay and it's just madness.

Tree of the day: For lunch we stopped at a delicious Mexican restaurant on Route 1 somewhere near Northport, Maine. We ate on the deck out back, and enjoyed the gorgeous weather and the glorious shade provided by a very nice White Ash tree.
Beer of the day: Seaworthy IPA from Big Tide Brewing

Tomorrow: more time wandering around Saint John, and ultimately ending up camping in Fundy National Park.

It's Mari-time!

I couldn't resist.

Bags packed (record turnaround of arriving home from the Outer Banks at 2AM, sleeping, doing laundry, packing, showering and ready and antsy to get going). Totally stoked to be traveling with the amazing JACK again. Canada and the Lighthouse Challenges (though one lacked a vowel) have been really great experiences and I'm thrilled to be spending a few days straight with some of the best girls I know.


Things I'm most excited for, in no real order--

• Spending time together. It's been hard with Amanda living a state or two away, me being all over the place, grad schools and various other challenges. I'm really thankful that Jamie and Katie live so close but it can be challenging to coordinate.
• New Brunswick. I thought it would be hilarious whilst attending school in New Brunswick, NJ, to say "Hey, going to New Brunswick for the weekend!" and leaving the country. That never happened, but I'm still amused.
• Seeing stuff I learned in college in real life. Thanks Dawn Bowen.
• Finding a moose. It's going to happen.
• Seeing the joy on Katie's face as we stop at some of the big things in eastern Canada!
• Helping Jamie rack up some miles on her new car.
• Seeing Amanda for more than a day!
• CANADA!
• EVERYTHING!!!

We'll be updating http://tinnybopper.livejournal.com, our blog from our first Canadian roadtrip, but I'll probably cross post/ update here for posterity, too. Yay!

quick rundown

I promise more details in the not-so-distant future (August at the latest, when I return home from all of this awesome nonsense!)--

lots of things around Mercer, Middlesex, Monmouth, Ocean, Camden and Burlington counties with NRCS
San Francisco to Reno in early June, including but hardly limited to REDWOOD TREES!
to camp to help with staff check-in at the beginning of their training week
Irwin, PA with Jr. High mission trip
Walpole Island, ON with Sr. High mission trip
Duck, NC with the Hennessey clan
New Brunswick, Nova Scotia and Prince Edward Island with JACK

and then I will be staying still for at least a while, as this fall I'm teaching for Rutgers at Brookdale and am also taking a position as an adjunct professor at William Paterson. I'll be taking a class online through a school in North Dakota, and then hopefully will prove myself eligible for a dream job of some sort and start a whole new adventure in 2013...?

another 20 mph sort of weekend

That quote under the title of this blog is from my good friend Paul, and it was referring to a trip to Williamsburg, VA that I took in under 36 hours a few years ago.

Well, this past weekend reaffirmed that quote, and how appropriate that it was back to Williamsburg for Paul's wedding to the amazing Laura. My role in the wedding was to deliver by noon Paul's groomsman and youngest brother, Pat, who had a prom to attend in NJ the night before.

Challenge accepted.

We left Pine Beach at 4AM. My friends Mike and Katy came so that 1. they could visit our friend Eric in Mechanicsville, on the way to Williamsburg, and 2. so that there were a few more passengers who might be awake with me. Good thing they came, because Pat was a little bit tired. Actually, Katy was too. They were like toddlers, asleep in the back seat.

I drove into sunrise around the Delaware Memorial Bridge. Pee break at one of the northern Maryland houses. Coffee break at Hyperion in Fredericksburg. Dropped off Katy and Mike at Eric's, and got myself ready for the wedding there (figuring I couldn't mess myself up too badly during the hour of car ride that Pat and I had left from there).

Hit traffic.

STILL got Pat to the hotel by 11:30.

I wandered around Williamsburg for a little while, enjoying the Wawa in the historic building and a lengthy fife and drum parade before wandering back to the church, still a bit early for the wedding. I dozed in the car in the parking lot for a while, listening to the musicians warm up.

And then, the wedding. The beautiful, beautiful wedding. Congratulations to Paul and Laura!

The reception was lots of fun (great beer!). I enjoyed catching up with some wonderful people.

The drive the next morning was not the greatest. Well, the drive was fine, but man I was tired. I went home Sunday morning to make it for my afternoon concert at church. Thank goodness for Mike and Katy, whose collective company kept me awake and alert the whole time. Another glorious 20ish mph weekend.

I believe I deserve an A+ in day trips and changes of scenery...

...but definitely fail in planning ahead and getting adequate sleep.

After several weeks? months? of being in one state and not really going too far, I was desperate for a change of scenery. All semester I've been telling my cousin and my undergraduate advisor that I would come sit in on the class that the former is currently taking with the latter. I had Monday off. These stars all aligned and I took a day trip to Fredericksburg!

I stayed with Amanda and Mike in Bear, Delaware on Sunday night after a lovely Easter with my choir and my family. As I pulled off the highway into their neighborhood, I noticed ahead on the highway a sign for Route 301. The wheels were turning as I fell asleep in their guest room...

I woke up at dark o'clock and turned back on that highway. It's been years since I've taken 301 to get to Fredericksburg. Several cars and chicken trucks were heading north, but I did not see another car heading south with me until nearly sunrise, about an hour and a half after I left. Very peaceful drive along a rolling landscape.

Got to Mary Washington around 8:30AM and immediately picked up my cousin for a visit to Hyperion before following her to that class.Everything in Fredericksburg was blooming and gorgeous. I was so happy to have Hyperion in my hand and head to the geography department.

Class was good, and hanging out with my former professors was really great. I was so happy to have this change of scenery so heavy laden with dogwood flowers, cherry blossoms and wonderful people.

After class, I walked downtown to meet Jeremy, my stand partner from eight consecutive semesters of wind ensemble. We got more Hyperion (yay! and this excitement from the girl who doesn't drink coffee usually...) and sat in his office on the top floor of the museum overlooking a busy intersection downtown. It was basically awesome.

Beautiful, beautiful day. The weather cooperated, the drive wasn't terrible (even if it was ridiculous) and the change of scenery has me feeling refreshed and excited. A+

quick drive to visit Spain

as in the tribe, not the country.

I love my people. I know that I am seriously lucky to be related to so many kind, hilarious, wonderful individuals on both sides of my family. This weekend was a Spain weekend though. My cousin Bekea and her family were up from Kentucky, so we gathered en masse for lunch yesterday. It was wonderful to meet her new daughter Bronwen, to congratulate Jon and Janet on their engagement, to see Kathie's girls (even if they still haven't figured out who I am), to see pictures of Tulip and hear how ridiculous she is, and to catch up with everyone a little bit.

Aside from the normal banter and sarcasm though were some words of encouragement that I don't think were meant to be a subtle pep talk, but really lifted my spirits that have been dragging a bit for the past couple of months. (This is not to say that the love that many of you have extended to me has not been appreciated; believe you me, I would not have left my pile of blankets on the couch without your words.) I guess I've developed a reputation as a world traveler? I totally love this. The first question from many of my cousins was, "Where to next?"

The truth is, not too far for a while. I'm heading to Fredericksburg in a week for a quick visit with my cousin and my alma mater. I'll be in Virginia toward the end of the month for a lovely friend's bridal shower and my fourth attempt at the Muddy Buddy. I'm planning hopefully two short trips to the beautiful country to the north this summer (Walpole Island, Ontario and all over New Brunswick in July and August, respectively). These are all wonderful things. (and I guess I'm not giving them enough credit for not exactly being in my backyard...)

What I loved most about the "where to next" was the open endedness of it. Just because next isn't that imminent, doesn't mean it's not going to happen. I don't have any elaborate plans yet, but I'm really excited about leaving my life up to all of these nexts and yets, and really owe a lot of people more thanks than I could possibly express.

Besides giving me things to contemplate and smile about, the Spain family just makes me laugh a lot. So, thanks for that too, guys.

But thanks everyone, Spain or not, for all of the love you've sent my way as I figure out the nexts and the yets of my life. Seriously.

Peace Corps Update

As many of you know, I applied to serve with Peace Corps. This is something I'd been thinking about for a very long time, especially since my short time in Malawi, and after spending a lot of time talking with friends who have gone through the program, it seemed like the right time. I have long been interested in the developing world and serving others there. I actually applied back in October and had my interview in December. And then I waited.

and waited.

and waited.

And about a month ago, I received an email from my recruiter. I was not placed. She has withdrawn my application.



This has been extremely devastating and deeply frustrating. The days that followed were full of tears and lacking sound sleep. My immediate reaction was that I didn't want anyone to know. At that time, it's honestly because I was embarrassed. Who gets rejected from Peace Corps? What's wrong with me? How did this happen? What am I going to do? All questions that I didn't particularly want to answer, and still don't. It took a couple of weeks for this news to sink in and not completely overwhelm me every day. I still can't get it off my mind though.

I want to apologize to those of you who have asked me about this in the past month. I carefully responded to almost all of you, "I'm still waiting" because in a way, I am. I'm planning on reactivating my application and going through the placement process again, in hopes of a better outcome. I am sorry for misleading you, but I hope you can understand how much I've been struggling with this.

Eventually the embarrassment gave way to a nasty cycle of self-doubt, which continued my strong feelings of not telling anyone. While I've been rejected from tons of jobs in the past year, this one really hurt. This is something I was really excited for, really confident about and really looking forward to. I've been feeling rather low about myself. I know I am totally blessed with a lot of loving, encouraging people in my life, but in spending all of this time thinking about this whole situation, I also realized that what I need right now in my life is not pep talks, which is what lead me to continue not telling anyone. I don't actually think I'm a terrible person, in fact, in general, I think my education and experience are pretty great and that I'm a relatively qualified citizen of earth. I'm ok. But I am struggling with this, and trying to convince me that I am not loser only makes me feel worse for feeling bad in the first place. It's an ugly cycle, I know, but I'm being honest-- that's where I am with this.

If you're reading this, there's a good chance that you care enough about me to just keep being who you are in my life, which is what I really need right now. I still don't really want to talk about this, and I'm really hoping that this reactivation leads to much happier news soon.

I have written and rewritten this several times now, and the words never seem quite right, but I think I'm just going to share it as is, because it's quite a weight I've been carrying and I'm hoping that unloading it will be the first step into the next awesome part of my life, whatever it may be.

Nothing like driving across the state, through the Pines, on Route 70, enjoying the last of a beautiful day's sunshine, having three of your favorite girls in the recently cleaned car with you. Also awesome-- the destination was the Haddonfield Presbyterian Church, one of my stops on the Johnsonburg World Tour last year, to enjoy the beautiful concert put on by Baylor A Capella. Great day.

winding down 571

Yesterday I took a trip out to Princeton to help my friend Pam with a research project. I've mentioned before that when I go to Princeton, I prefer to take a winding county road, Route 571. It goes through the Pine Barrens a bit before some old farmland before getting out to Princeton. It takes nearly twice as long but it's so pleasant to drive.

Pam needed to interview me for a research project about Harry Potter. It was actually a great conversation. Afterward, we met up with several other Princeton people (mostly seminarians) for lunch. Jeffrey, Emma, Kate, Pam, Andrew and I enjoyed some soup and sandwiches and ridiculous conversation about camp and youth ministry and other silliness. Andrew was telling me about this awesome park in Princeton with dozens and dozens of exotic trees (and natives! and all mapped and labelled!) that he and some of our friends recently went to before ending their adventures at Triumph Brewery. I told him it sounded like the best day ever, and he said, "Funny you should say that..." and then gave me the quote of my life that had apparently come up amongst the boys at the brewery that night--


"If someone ever wanted to wine and dine Colleen, that's probably how they should do that."

Except instead of "wine and dine" it should probably be "tree and beer". And he's absolutely right.



I'm still getting over my cold from last week, otherwise we probably would have gone to Triumph for lunch.

My drive home on 571 was absolutely lovely, winding through Mercer, Monmouth and Ocean counties. This time I was particularly taken with Roosevelt Township, a homestead resettlement project under the New Deal in 1937. The project failed, but it's a nice small town with a lot of farmland around it, much of which is preserved. It was a beautiful day and a nice drive. I love visiting Princeton.

This morning I drove the guest director from yesterday's bell festival to Philadelphia airport. I had a few hours before work and our director, who organizes the festival, really needed someone to drive. I like driving. It worked out well.

I've driven out Route 70 through the Pine Barrens many, many times but tend to pick out different things to focus on each time. Today I was kind of contemplating the back roads that I never take, and what they're like.

On the way out to the airport, I passed a terrible wreck around 11:15 and probably ten emergency vehicles. A pickup was wrapped around a tree on the eastbound side, facing westbound. It was clear to me that the driver could not have survived. I have no idea how the truck went off the road like that in the middle of a clear, dry day.

The mess was still there when I was coming back from the airport two hours later. Traffic was being diverted onto one of those very side roads I was curious about. It was a single lane road that went by a few simple houses. A man was out for a run and probably wondering where all of these cars were coming from. It was interesting to get off Route 70 for a few minutes, but unfortunately a very sad reminder that despite my cold, despite my aches from the weekend, despite how tired I was and didn't feel like going to work later-- my day was most definitely not so bad.

Leader of the Year

Now that I work four part-time jobs and have one unpaid internship, the adventures have unfortunately been kept to a minimum. However, this past weekend was Jr. High Wintercamp at Lake Champion, which is not my favorite place in the world but I do love our middle school youth group and the hilarity that ensues when taking them on adventures...

I actually left earlier than our group on Friday because I needed to be back earlier than our group on Sunday for the annual handbell festival at church. Mike kindly agreed to drive up with me. We left well ahead of rush hour, so had enough time to stop at Johnsonburg because I 1. wanted to hike, 2. wanted to say hello, 3. am constantly campsick and 4. why not, it wasn't that far out of the way. After a pleasant afternoon of Red Trail, hanging out by the fireplace with Kate from Princeton, pizza with the retreat staff and tea with Kurt, Lorelei, Tadd and Abi, we carried on to Glen Spey, New York to register our group for the retreat and await their arrival.

Doug, Katie and fourteen of our middle schoolers arrived in good time, unpacked and immediately got going. At the first leaders' meeting, I volunteered myself and one of our youth for an on-stage activity without listening to what the game was-- turns out it was pie roulette. Thankfully, I was able to slam a whipped cream pie in my kid's face and leave the stage before anyone could get me.

We were extremely fortunate to have sunny, blue skies despite strong predictions of heavy rains. Saturday was a beautiful day. A bit windy, a bit chilly, but it's winter and it was just nice to be able to hang out with the group in the sunshine. My favorite part was probably when they were all exploring the rocky little stream by the bridge; I'd told them to stay away from it in the morning because I didn't want to deal with cold, soggy children, but when I was elsewhere in the afternoon, they wandered down and told me upon catching them there, "Mike said it was ok." Mike did not say it was ok, but I told them fine, as long as there was no whining when they fell in. Many fell in. None whined. It was very peaceful and pleasant just watching them enjoy being outside and in each other's company.

Evening came. After the last group meeting on Saturday night, the retreat traditionally has a skit night lead by various leaders. This year they had something called the Leader Challenge instead. Because I have lots of enthusiasm and no shame, I volunteered for our group. The Challenge went something like this--

Round 1: Relay. All of the leaders were corralled on the stage in the front of the room and given various tasks to complete and be one of the first eight to return to the stage. Tasks included, "Go back to your youth group and return with a scarf tied around your head" (for once in my life I did not bring a scarf, nor did any of our people, so I ran to the youth group where someone tied a jacket around my head-- the leaders accepted it, and I passed the first round); "Go touch the back wall of the room and put on three sweatshirts from your youth group" (almost thwarted by my group's enthusiasm-- they kept putting the sweatshirts on me, one arm through a sleeve, one arm through the neck hole. Every time. I won this round anyway.). Several other ridiculous feats later, the task was to touch the back wall and return to the stage with a youth on our backs. Thankfully, my youth group had one teensy hyperactive child who was perfect for that job. Unfortunately, the final task was to do a lap around the room with said youth on my back, which would have been fine had I not badly pulled my left quad at some point during the round. That was the only part I lost.

Round 2: Trivia. Specifically, middle school trivia. Also, the challenge leaders sprayed us in the face with water guns while we answered, because a room full of screaming junior high kids wasn't enough. Luckily, my questions were, "Who was Woody's owner in Toy Story?" and "What team does Tim Tebow play for" (which I admit, I second guessed myself-- which horse team? Colts? Broncos? But one of our youth group boys was thankfully doing star jumps and screaming BRONCOS! BRONCOS! at the top of his lungs) and "Name the 13 original colonies" (which I admit now that I got wrong in the insanity of the moment, but the guys seemed impressed enough that I was able to quickly name 13 old, east coast states and accepted it... I said Maine but left out Georgia. My bad.). I think the only reason I made it past this round was because it was down to three of us (they needed two) and the girl before me was asked to name all four Beatles... which she didn't seem to be able to do while being sprayed with water and screamed at by all of the middle schoolers, but my kids helped by yelling things like, "ADAM SANDLER! BILLY JOEL!"

Round 3: the pies. It was down to me and one other girl. We were plastic wrapped from our shoulders to our ankles and laid face down on the stage. A line of whipped cream pies was set up, and the object was to squirm our way up the stage and plant our faces in each one along the way. Remember the all the enthusiasm/none of the shame moment? I owned the competition and was crowned Leader Of The Year.

There was also a redemption round for all of the people who didn't win--

Round 4: the mayonnaise. Thankfully it wasn't really mayo, but plain yogurt in little mayo jars that we had to eat with our hands. I won this too.

The weather was beautiful and as always, I am so so thankful to have such amazing youth. Despite coming down with a really rough cold and being covered with bruises and I'm pretty sure there's still whipped cream up my nose and in my ear, we had a pretty great time together.

Happy New Year!

I've never really done anything particularly crazy for New Year's (except the time I was in Sunderland, England and called home at midnight there because I thought it would be funny that it was only 7PM at home, and home's response was "You must be drunk, it's only 7PM here). Most years involve some combination of laid back friends, cheese and crackers, board games, the Twilight Zone marathon, and watching the ball drop in Times Square on the TV at midnight.

This year was chill as ever due to the fact that I had to work at my stupid job till 10PM. I joined Jamie and Katie and a few of their friends from high school at a small bar in Pine Beach for a little while before heading back to Jamie's house. Jamie and Katie went in the hot tub and I sat nearby, bundled up.

It was chilly, clear night. Tons of stars. Very quiet and peaceful. We didn't have the TV or radio on, in fact, were pretty much sitting in the dark. And then it happened-- we could hear some distant shouting which quickly grew louder and was joined with pots and pans, party horns, firecrackers and fireworks. Midnight happened, as it would whether we were paying attention or not. I kind of liked it that way.

Happy 2012. It's off to a pretty good start-- today I played music in church, walked my brother's sweet dog, took an awesome nap, bottled my latest home brew (a stout!), and am watching the Twilight Zone.

Let the good times roll.